I think I can...I feel like the little engine that could. I needed to see if I could parent solo successfully so I ventured out on my own with my new baby girl. Once on Father's Day to give her Daddy, Mr. C some snooze time. Which to a new parent is worth its weight in gold and he was oh so appreciative, when he woke up at almost 3pm.Zoey and I left the house at or around 10am hit the drug store and headed for my parents house. A comfortable territory for me to practice my parental skills with some supervision from Gammy and Grumpy. Gammy took her from me almost immediately, put her to sleep and I didn't really see my baby till I was about to leave. After his late awakening we spent the rest of the afternoon up until 10pm that night at his folks house for a Father's day Celebration. I had her most of the time when the his family wasn't passing her around. I wanted him to be able to enjoy his family and play some of the games they had set up (volleyball, horse shoes, target shooting). All in all a pretty safe and successful journey, but I had lots of help so it didn't satisfy my need for independent parenting.
I needed some more practice. So on Monday, baby girl and I ventured out again on a huge outing to my cousins house for a drop in visit which ended up at the river and not only with my lil' girl but also with her two lil' boys of 2yrs and the other of 4yrs old. I didn't realize what I was in for. My daughter behaved beautifully, to my surprise. My cousin tried to soothe her cries but she wanted Mama and I bounced her and fed her like a pro. I can't hardly believe it myself. Usually when she starts a fit Mr.C is the only one she wants and quiets for him almost instantly. This time I was sufficient for her and she relaxed just the way she does for him. We sat in my cousin's front yard under the trees till her 4yr old came home from school at or around noon. Then off to the River.
I was nervous about going on a spur of the moment trip to the river. New moms usually don't do anything on the fly and I didn't realize I said yes till we were on our way. As we were driving I started to get anxious and started doubting myself but I should have been doubting my cousin.
When we got there. My cuz drops me, baby girl, her 2 boys and all the gear off near the river shore. She leaves me to carry it all and watch her kids while she parks the vehicle back up in the parking lot a long ways off. I felt like a camel with a crooked hump trying to lug it all to a spot on the beach. Did I mention I had a c-section like 7wks ago. She didn't remember obviously. Her boys listened pretty well and followed me to a sunny spot. Of course all the shady spots under the trees were taken already. So we copped a spot directly in the blaring sun. Not exactly ideal for my infant of now 7wks. A nice beach goer offered her kids toys for my lil cuzzez to play with and introduced her boy of 3yrs and her daughter of 6mo. The 3yr old played with my cousins children till she came from the parking lot. My daughter was asleep and stayed that way till we left. She was a dream.
I was very nervous of the heat and fussed over her and shaded her with my two umbrellas. I got in the water about up to my hips but couldn't take my eyes off her on the shore. She never even stirred. She was great for our first trip. After a little while I relaxed some.
As I sat on the shore watching my family play in the river, I notice my cousin playing with her youngest and chatting with the beach lady. Then I notice beach lady's son, who had on a life vest, playing with my cousins eldest the 4yr old who had nothing but shorts on and a smile. I called to my cousin 3x hey!, hey!!! Cousin!!! Get your boy!!! I see his red hair under water. I begin to get up because she was so oblivious to what was going on. The beach lady's boy was not intending to but was holding down my cousins boy as the both of them went sailing down the river about 20-30ft. I get up to rescue my cousins kid and just as I did, he popped up and gasped for air and was able to touch bottom. Thank god!!! I made him get out for a bit.
Needless to say I scolded my cousin's parenting skills, she was sooo oblivious. She is new to parenting thing too, these are foster children she has and intends to adopt them. She has only been a parent a little longer than I have been. Not only that but she was standing in knee high water with the 2yr old wading on his back between her legs so he could practice floating. She didn't even realize how awful that looked as she wiggled above his head in a dance to make him smile. I told her that is completely inappropriate for her to do with her kid whether her intentions were innocent or not. It looked horrendous. I told her that we needed to be getting back and started to pack up my daughter, who was still sound asleep.
These outings deeply satisfied my need for independent parenting practice and now I feel much more confident and not only do I think I can, I know I can. My cousin however needs much more practice. Until next time wish me luck.
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